Nobody knows what's best for me but myself, it might not be the best I could have done as I will find out maybe later in life, but right at that moment, that's the best I knew how to do and it was the best for me. Situations change, circumstances change and what was good for me then, isn't necessarily good for me now. But I won't know. The same goes for behaviour, I started one behaviour for a reason at some time, but it doesn't necessarily still feed the same purpose it once did.
Somehow I got stuck at a certain age in my childhood/adolescence and certain events just bring those feelings to the front. I then have to recognize that the incident right now has absolutely nothing to do with the incident back then, and then I will be ok and can rationalize things. It's when I turn automatically into this child as a reaction to a situation, that all hell usually breaks loose. But the only way out is trough it.
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