Tuesday, April 18, 2006

I have come way too far

Well over the last few months I have been working hard on me, not my outside, but the inside, I still have some major struggles to content with but I know which battles I can win, even though the "losing part" is just a wrong thought or a wrong believe away. But I have come way to far to let some of these incidents and other's problems and jealousies and insecurities drag me back to my old beliefs about me. Some might not like it, but that's not my problem either, I am not giving up on my new found believes and gains of myself, to make others feel better.
I admit I have a hard time with it, but I find between every little thing, there is always a fine line and balance is the key. I am not snotty about my things, I just stand my ground, where before I would have retreated.All my life I have down played myself to make others feel better, I won't do it no more. I will not let others negative thoughts towards me change my feeling and how I do things. And I will not make excuses and apologize for anything either, take it as it is or leave it. This is my emotional victory, even if it feels bad inside right now, because I haven't done it enough, I will not falter this time. NO WAY. I control myself and nothing else and neither do others, they control themselves and nothing else, even if they think they are.
So we will see how this will all play out today. I know what I am doing, and do not care what others do or say... but I do will stick with my PIC.

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