It's weird when you have to deal with certain things in your life that sometimes you don't know when the right time is to deal with them. Do I deal with it now when I am not in that mind frame or do I deal with it the next time it hits me again? When I am not in that mind frame it's hard even for me to understand why it is like that, so it's really hard to even think about being that way and there for it's hard to deal with, but when it hits, it is so far out of control and the emotions are just too high to be even dealt with then on a rational level. So I am just taking day by day and am grateful that today wasn't a day that I felt like this. But I know sooner or later I do have to deal with it and so will many others, like it or not, it's just part of me. And maybe coming out of hidding with it won't make it so scary anymore. But then it's been my little secret since I was 13, so it will be hard to let go of the only thing that always has been mine and only mine.
But I think it's time....
If you're going through hell, keep going. ~Winston Churchill
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