Ready to blow my top

There are some situations in my life right now where I am close to blowing my anger top, on one hand I think it's about time, but on the other hand it scares the hell out of me, because that's one way I don't want to be.
Some people call me a people pleaser, well to a certain degree that might be so, but then on the other side, what is wrong with making other people's day by small gestures or words, I am not lying to them, I know how to say no and I have said no on many occasions, so where is the line between being nice, kind and compassionate and people pleasing, yeah maybe if I do it and it hurts my integrity, but that's not how I see it. If I don't want to do it I don't, so how is that people pleasing.
I am tired of being the perpetrator in some people's drama, when I have nothing to do with the situation. And I have started to take responsibility for my own role in some of these dramas that I recreated to be then my dramas and I have taken steps to write those people and release them of any responsibility and therefore took ownership of my part, we all play different parts, and we all are responsible for our own feelings. So how we take things as our own probably has nothing to do with what the other person meant or felt at that time and made known.
I think I finally get the thing with forgiveness being good for you and not letting others of the hook, it's just taking responsibility and ownership of your part and I think the one that needs the most forgiveness is me by me. So I am working on that one right now, it's not easy but it's necessary. I created all my own life stories, so it's only fair that I tell my truth, not as I see it but as it is. Because I think to a degree we are all guilty of seeing things our way, no matter how healed we think we are. And I know the past weeks have shown me that I am not doing as well as I thought I was,YET. But I will. "YET" is Janice's favourite word for me. lol. Well right now I am glad you believe in me and some others do too. Like a good old friend of mine used to say, "if you think you don't have enough confidence borrow some of mine, I have plenty." Well I am getting it and more. Thanks W., you have always seen the good in me and my potentials. I think it's time I make that my own.